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White Nun, Black Nurse

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White Nun, Black Nurse: a Connection forged by George Floyd

July 6, 2021

by Patty Cook

 

Social Justice

I am a white nun, 86 years old, who was spurred by George Floyd‘s murder last year to immerse myself in anti-racist learning. Although my religious order, the Sisters of Mercy of the Americas, has put overcoming racism at the heart of our mission, the more I read about, pray about and study it, the more I see my own blind spots. An encounter I had a few months ago with Wendian Davis, a young Jamaican nurse practitioner, made me realize how little I understand my white privilege — or what anti-racism work is about.

Ms. Davis gave me permission to share this story. We spoke on the phone at length when I first started writing this essay, and she kindly reviewed its many drafts.

Ms. Davis came to my Connecticut home last fall for a wellness visit that I receive annually through the state, thanks to my former chaplaincy ministry in a maximum-security men’s prison. As she was finishing her session, with its helpful wellness tips, she asked what I had been reading lately.

I told her about my immersion into anti-racist literature and how I was especially moved by the books of Ibram X. Kendi and Isabel Wilkerson. I had just finished Kendi’s How to Be an Antiracist and was taken with his ideas about how space is “racialized” in our society and given resources (or not) according to its perceived worthiness by those with power. Ms. Davis was interested and intrigued, full of questions.

She then asked if she might share something personal. “Of course,” I said.

Wendian Davis

She told me that when she goes home in the evenings, as she is driving up her driveway, she sighs a deep breath of relief and gratitude because she leaves white space and enters her own Black space. She puts down her imaginary spear, takes off her invisible helmet and protective armor, divests herself of the high-energy focus of her day spent in white space and re-enters the Black space of her home. Since she is arriving late, her Black husband and Black children are already fixing the dinner and setting the table. Now, she can unwind, eat, laugh, rest, enjoy her life. As Ms. Davis shared these things with me, she smiled behind her mask and shield. But her smile was betrayed by her wet eyes.

She went on, telling me that her exhaustion had nothing to do with her nursing work, which she loves, or with driving around suburban Connecticut to visit patients. (Almost all her house-call clients are white people, as our health care system in the United States is so skewed against people who live in poverty, many of whom are people of color.) Her fatigue was about the energy she must exert to navigate white space.

She told me: “Sister, your white ears would fall off your white head if you heard some of harsh things that people say to me.” Over the years, she said, she has learned to pause and take a breath when blindsided by white patients’ racist words and attitudes. Most of her patients do not see their racism or think of themselves as racist, Ms. Davis emphasized. But to survive in white space, she must work with her guard up — way, way up.

As I listened to Ms. Davis, I realized with shocking clarity that my white skin meant I could never fully understand the pain of racism that she and countless Black people in our country suffer daily. I also saw that I had missed what it means for me and my white brothers and sisters to become anti-racist and to work for an anti-racist society until Ms. Davis pulled back the veil in her sharing.

Anti-racism must be about justice. It must be about building a society where Black people and other people of color can flourish as full citizens without being impeded, harmed or killed by white people. If anti-racist learning doesn’t lead to white people like me helping with humility to bring about a complete reordering of our society through systemic and personal change — what the Rev. William Barber II and Jonathan Wilson-Hartgrove call the Third Reconstruction — then we are just wringing our hands and perpetuating injustice.

I ponder the anti-racism work that is mine to do despite my advanced years and limitations. I’m aware that my long life has spanned nearly a quarter of the four centuries that Black people in this country have suffered from racism’s evils. I pray that I can be part of a Third Reconstruction of justice with my Black brothers and sisters and all people of color and that I will continue to be open to having my blind spots around racism pierced.

Deep is my gratitude to Ms. Davis for lighting my path.

Mr. Floyd — my dear brother — you have touched my world and rocked it. May you rest in the peace and glory of God.

 

Patty Cook is a member of the Sisters of Mercy of the Americas living in East Haven, Connecticut. Presently, she is a spiritual director and retreat director at Mercy by the Sea retreat center.

 

 

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“He Beckons Us to Lie Down in Green Pastures”

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Did you know that today’s story of the miraculous feeding is recorded in all four New Testament gospels?  It is the only one of Jesus’ miracles that all four evangelists relate.  It must have held great import for each of them: Matthew, Mark, Luke and John tell the story of the day when Jesus fed five thousand with five loaves of bread and two fish.  Each embellishes his version with their own details and emphases.  Mark and Matthew tell us Jesus commands the people out there in the wilderness to sit down on the green grass.  Why this reference to the color of the grass?  To know the answer one will have to wait until the day we see those fellows in heaven.  It reminds me of Psalm 23: “He beckons me to lie down in green pastures.”

John’s version of the event is probably the one we learned as children.  We could relate to the generous young boy who shared his five barley loaves and two fish.  We’re not told how it happened that the boy had the fish and the loaves.  I like to project my thinking that he, like most people at that time, would not dream of going out into the wilderness without at least a little something to eat and drink.

So the story, it seems to me, continues in a “pay it forward” style.  You know, similar to the Dairy Queen drive-thru customer who paid for the car coming up behind him.  That started a chain reaction that lasted for three days, 200 thankful Dairy Queen customers!  Like the generosity of the young boy on the green grass at Jesus’ feet.  He started a chain pay-it-forward reaction that enabled Jesus to feed the hungry crowd.  Some evangelists say it was 5,000 people; others 5,000 not counting the women and children.  I find it interesting that in John’s version Jesus tells the apostles to have the people recline and John says the men reclined.  What were the women doing?  I would venture a guess they were doing “women’s work” – rounding up the kids, wondering if there’d be enough bread and what they were going to give the men to drink???

What trust!  What faith in Jesus the apostles showed in telling the people to relax!  Be patient.  Sit down!  Surely they could not fathom how all these people could be fed.  Even pooling all their supplies, they certainly did not have the resources to feed this crowd.  What were they to do now that they had people seated and waiting to see what would happen next?  That’s what you call FAITH!  That’s obedience – trusting the wisdom of God to do the impossible!  We just need to take the first step: Listen and obey the prompting of the Spirit: tell the people to be seated.

No doubt Jesus could have multiplied the available supplies if he wanted to.  But, as John asks, to what end?  John asks and answers that exact question.  The very next day the people would again be hungry.  They’d be looking for something to fill their bellies.  They’d not be clamoring “Speech! Speech!  Share a good word!  Let’s hear it!”  Likely they’d be waiting for the apostles to open Jesus’ food distribution center.

On this day, out in the wilderness, John tells us that the people ate and were satisfied.  Which would be more satisfying to you, a full belly for a single afternoon, or a glimpse, a vision of what life looks like when lived in the company of generous people under the reign of God?

What would our world be like if people acknowledged that they are called to be transformed?  What if we were truly as open-handed with our possessions as the young boy on the hillside was with his?  What would be the status of the pandemic if everyone followed CDC advice: get vaccinated, wear a mask, wash your hands?  And, what if we really believed that Jesus still has the power to take the gifts we offer and to create from our generosity, widespread outbreaks of sharing?  As I watched the Olympics opening ceremony I was thinking “This is lovely – a testament to the ingenuity of computer whizzes, but with the millions spent in the production and given by sponsors – so much good could have been done.  But quickly it seemed God said, yes, that may be true.  But wouldn’t you rather see all those dollars and tech savvy spent to amaze and inspire people than on cyber-crimes and weapons of violence?  With positive, other-directed thinking and actions, I daresay that the world could be transformed, and over 3.1 million children a year (one child every 10 seconds) would not die of hunger.  More people would reflect the attitude and model the efforts of the Benedictine Sisters of Florida, our Oblates and our supporters in their ministry to respond “with the compassion of Christ to the hungers of the people of God” (BSofFL Corporate Commitment).

~Reflection by Sister Roberta Bailey, OSB, Prioress

 

Join us this week in prayer as we remember our Grandparents and the elderly: their needs and in gratitude for their contributions to our lives.

This week the Sisters are also remembering in a special way our guests: those who have visited us over the years AND those who have met and become our friends via social media – God bless them / you all!

 

First Reading:   2 Kings 4:42-44           Second Reading:   Ephesians 4:1-6
Gospel:    John 6:1-15
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Come away. To a deserted place. All by yourselves. And rest a while.

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It seems to me we would be hard put to find a more appropriate Gospel for people preparing to travel in COVID times.  Jesus invites us: Come away by yourself to a deserted place and rest awhile.  “Ah, but Jesus,” you might be thinking: “most of us are tired of “deserted places.”  But the idea of “rest while” from all the restrictions, the tangible fears, the ZOOM meeting.  Now, that’s appealing.”

And, we’d think it bizarre for a traveler not to be prepared for their journey.  We’d feel pity for the poor traveler who never read his/her itinerary and knew what the changing CDC requirements for the day of travel and at the destination.  Which of these hundreds of aircraft might go where I want to go is the most safety conscious?  Another summer the journey might not be the destination.  We might be looking forward to the great feeling of just relaxing and enjoying a drive.  Without wondering are we there yet?  Does this motel look clean?  Does this station have gas?  Another summer we might view a crowded restaurant parking lot as a sign of “good food.”  Today, we search for a place “not too crowded” for social distancing.

This week Jesus invites us, forget all that and “come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest a while.”  There are four parts to that statement – each one means something on its own:  Come away.  To a deserted place.  All by yourselves.  And rest a while.

Some people (surely not any of us) wear a badge of busyness as if it were a badge of honor.  You might hear: “How are things going?”  “Well, it been pretty crazy, I’ve been busy all day.  Not enough time for everything.”  The implicit message being: “I’m worthwhile because I’m busy.”  But, you and I know it’s not really a badge of honor – it a sign of an imbalanced life …   Remember the little saying: “all work and no play makes Jill a dull person.”  There’s a better one: “Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.”

Listen closely to Jesus’ words of invitation.  He says precisely: Come away.  He doesn’t say “get away” or “go away.”  No, he says: “Come away.”  An invitation that implies companionship” with the one whose yoke is easy.  The One who promises His burden is light.

To a deserted place.  I’m reminded of a message a few years ago from our retreat director Abbot Primate Gregory Polan: “It is my conviction that monasteries are among the most important places to our world today …  what we offer is a warm welcome, whoever you are and whatever your story in life tells; we say, ‘come and be with us and find healing in the Word of God that we offer you’.”  During COVID times our message from Holy Name may have been less “come away” but it was nonetheless sincere.  Our Development Staff, with the input of some of the Sisters has reached out through Eblasts, website posts, snail mail and ZOOM opportunities.  These were, and will continue to be invitation to our readers to recharge their spiritual batteries – to take time out of their self-made busyness trenches to keep company with God.

The view from the street here at the monastery offers sight of our grounds that are seen as an oasis for world-weary guests.  But the seeds we plant must be sown more deeply than the grass.  How good would a farm be if the owners only painted the silos and mended the fences?  But never sowed seeds: no veggies, no fruit = no dinner.

Just in case you missed it, the invitation Jesus extends is to be “All by yourselves.”  Jesus really means it.  We have to find and take advantage of moments of quietness and prayer.  The traffic can be whizzing by but in the quiet in the car I’m driving – maybe with gentle music in the background – can afford us time for “tightening the bonds that bind us ever closer to God and each other.”

And finally, Jesus says: Rest a while.  This isn’t laziness.  It’s not a perpetual state.  It’s temporary.  It’s for a while.  But, for that while, it’s about rest.  We cannot just minister to others day by day, month by month.  We won’t be able to take care of others if we don’t make time to cater to ourselves and our own needs.  We need to embrace the spiritual practice of rest.  And, while some may think you’re a little crazy (or lazy)…you’ll be crazy in all the right ways.

First, forget technology exists – except maybe for some soft, calming music.  Build in down-time to explore your feelings and get to the core of changes you need to make.  Seize the opportunity to enjoy nature, the glorious sky, the rolling clouds and that rainbow.  Take time to just BE.

Little by little you’ll discover that these “desert times” when you “come away awhile by yourself” with God can lift you out of life’s ruts and be restorative balm for body and spirit.

~Reflection by Sister Roberta Bailey, OSB, Prioress

 

First Reading  Jeremiah 23:1-6     Second Reading  Ephesians 2:13-18
Gospel Mark 6:30-34
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WE TRAVEL TWO BY TWO

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Luke and Matthew relate the same story heard in this gospel from Mark.   With Luke, you do realize, it was hearsay …  he was not there to give an eye-witness account.  It’s interesting to see the minor, but specific differences in the three accounts.  For example, here where Mark says, “take no money,” Matthew lays out the details, saying “take no silver, gold or copper coins.”  With his usual specificity he covers all the bases, not just the coinage in current use.  Matthew begins his account of Jesus’ reminder to his disciple-missionaries: “You received without paying, so now give without being paid.”  Where we read in Mark “whatever house you enter,” Matthew is more direct: “Look for someone to welcome you.”  And, if when you wish them peace it is not returned, “take back your greeting.”  Unlike today’s account by Mark, both Luke and Matthew quote Jesus telling the disciples what not to take on their missionary journey: “take no beggar’s bag.”   [An interesting side note:  St. Benedict tells his followers when they go on a journey to take clean underwear, launder and return it when they return from their journey.]

Jesus instructs his disciples to live dependent on the hospitality of the community, just as Jesus depended on others to provide for his needs.  Remember what he told one of his potential followers – “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.”   Jesus expected his disciples to “eat what is served, be satisfied with the bedding provided, follow their schedule, and don’t try to go it alone.”  Remind you of the Benedict’s norms?

So let’s from all Jesus’ DON’T cautions, look at what Jesus says IS appropriate for our journey in order to carry on the mission of Jesus.

The first thing Jesus recommends is that we travel two by two. He is reminding us that we don’t have to go it alone.  We need a good support system as we experience life’s ups and downs; sunrises and sunsets; pandemics and family times of togetherness.  Sharing the good times is as important as sharing the not so great times.

Reminds me of an event years ago at the Special Olympics 100-meter dash.  Shortly after the start of the race one of the participants fell.  His sobs caught the attention of the other eight runners.  With little hesitation, they turned back, lifted up their fallen friend, locked arms and all crossed the finish line together.  The crowd rose to their feet and CHEERED for a long time.  These young people were all winners!  They understood that what really matters is supporting one another even if it means slowing down and changing the course to your intended goal.

Jesus continues: He recommends sandals for our feet and a tunic, but not a second of anything.  (How does your closet hold up to this mirror?)  Jesus asks us not to carry so much in our gunny sacks.  Stuffing our sacks full does nothing to change the situation – just adds wrinkles to our brow and sours our spirit.  Do what Jesus says: “shake the dust off your feet” and move on.

Jesus gives his approval to our carrying and using a walking stick.  That way we can keep moving when we encounter ruts and pebbles and unexpected sharp turns in our path.  Add support when you became worn out, tired and weary or wander off the edge of the road.  (Listen for the sound of those rumble strips – they are not just for decoration.  They call us to “stay alert”.)  A good walking stick helps us stay upright and get past mistakes which could hinder our spiritual growth and practice of conversio.  And, beyond that, it’s a fact that in order to do what we say in our community Corporate Commitment.  If we hope to “alleviate the hungers of the people of God with the compassion of Christ,” we must first be compassionate with ourselves.  (Corporate Commitment Statement)

Today Jesus sends us out once again, with authority over unclean spirits … over the rancor, the violence, the rudeness, the degrading language and actions, the insensitivity.  The list could go on and on.  We can conquer the darkness with a refusal to lower our behavior, language and standards.  We can “shake that dust from our feet” and support actions on behalf of justice and peace because we are traveling “two by two,” with the sturdy walking stick of community and prayer, and wearing the sandals of our vows.  Like the disciples, we heed Jesus’ admonition to stay put in the house where they took us in, we can anoint others with inclusivity, affirmation and peace.  Pray God we stay the course…

~Reflection by Sister Roberta Bailey, OSB

First Reading :  Amos 7:12-15     Second Reading:  Ephesians 1:3-14 
Gospel:  Mark 6:7-13
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“There can be no preaching in the wrong atmosphere.”

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“There can be no preaching in the wrong atmosphere.”

                                                                                                                                                William Barclay (1907-1978)

 

This reading from Mark’s Gospel reminds us that God sends prophets into our midst for our benefit.  The question is: Are we open-minded enough to listen to new ideas and insights, to allow our attention to be re-directed to things we have ignored or taken for granted?  For instance: how have we listened to, implemented Pope Francis’ invitation to care for all of creation, human and non-human?  Normally, papal documents are addressed to the bishops of the Church to disseminate and promote through their diocese.  But, Pope Francis addresses his message directly to us, his friends, the people of God.

You’ve heard the expression: “You can’t tell a book by its cover.”  All too often we judge the “cover.”  We get so bogged down in appearances, in the humanity of the proclaimer that we refuse to listen to the proclamation.  Who does she/he think she/he is?

You may have seen episodes of “America’s Got Talent” when you knew by the judges’ interaction with the performers that they were writing off this act before the contestant got started.  Like the time when the three fellows looking like they’d just rolled out of bed came on stage.  When they opened their mouths, spell-binding tenor music poured forth into the auditorium where hundreds, along with the judges, sat in stunned silence, open-mouthed, on the edges of their seats realizing what a terrible presumptive judgment they’d made.

Perhaps what is even worse is when we view ourselves in such a negative way that we say: “Who am I to tell anyone what to do or not do, when I know that often I do things far worse?”  The reality is that every one of us, simply because of our baptism, has been called to be a prophet.  There are some things over which we cannot compromise.  There are times when silence is the best response we can muster; when words would not improve the silence.  But there are many times when we cannot keep silent.  We cannot be dissuaded by our own shortcomings.  God will stand by us and give us what we need when we need it.  Relax, draw a deep breath, and remind yourself: “I don’t have to act today with yesterday’s grace.”  But we do need to remember if we fail to share the prophetic message of the Gospel, other louder voices will be happy to impose their godless vision on all of us.  It never has been easy to be a prophet and it never will be.  The message of the Gospel is challenging and sometimes controversial, but it’s a message that people (we) need to hear whether or not we want to hear it.  And God promises a prophet’s reward for fidelity to our mission.  On the other hand, if we prefer not to rock the boat, as Aristotle said “To avoid criticism…say nothing, do nothing, and be nothing.”

This story of one day in the life of Jesus we learn that his trip to Nazareth was not a private family visit.  He came for public ministry.  Usually when the people heard Jesus speak, they were amazed.  But, a lot of what he said confused his enemies.  They couldn’t explain Him, so they rejected His message.  They thought they knew everything about Him.  They knew Him as a “just” common craftsman, just another boy from Nazareth.  They voiced their thoughts: “You are no better than we are!  Why should we listen to you?”

These people did what most people do when they cannot understand someone.  They resorted to rejection, ridicule and the last refuge of a small mind: a tie-breaking put down!  They did what was never done in that society!  They insulted his mother calling him “Son of Mary.”  A male was always referred to as the son of his father, even if his father was dead.  To call a boy the son of his mother was to imply that His mother had been a harlot.  Jesus was amazed that these people lacked faith.  They had heard the truth, seen the truth and they still turned a deaf ear and a blind eye.  As a result, He left Nazareth, and there is no record that He ever returned there.

We may sum up this lesson in the words of William Barclay: “There can be no preaching in the wrong atmosphere.  The listeners are responsible for at least half of every sermon.  In an atmosphere of expectancy, the least effort will catch fire.  In an atmosphere of coldness or indifference, the most spirit-filled of sermons will fall flat.”

~Reflection by Sister Roberta Bailey, OSB

 

Please pray for those in the path of the hurricane.

                                                                                    Sister Roberta Bailey, OSB

 

First Reading  Ezekiel 2:2-5     Second Reading  2 Corinthians 12:7-10 
Gospel   Mark 6:1-6
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